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REVIEW: Gimme Head: The Tale of the Cuyahoga Valley Bigfoot

– By Dave Dubrow

GIMME HEAD: THE TALE OF THE CUYAHOGA VALLEY BIGFOOT goes a long way toward answering the age-old question, “Just because I can make a movie, should I?”

No. Just…just no. The answer is almost always no.

From the title to the subject matter to the cover image of some poor sap in a gorilla suit, it’s obvious that there’s no aspect to this production that was taken seriously. Nevertheless, efforts were made to infuse genuine humor, social commentary, and titillation into the script. Does that excuse the end result? No, but writer/director Logan Fry tried. And even succeeded here and there.

The story, a vehicle for the kind of humor I enjoyed quite a bit decades ago, centers around some grad students sitting in a coffee shop, watching a news report about Bigfoot stomping around the local woods. For reasons not made entirely clear, they decide to seek out this creature themselves…and find trouble not long after.

Production-wise, it’s consistent with microbudgeted indie horror films shot by people who don’t know what they’re doing. The sound quality was so terrible that I couldn’t hear long swatches of conversation over room tone and the soundtrack. Choppy editing, little to no use of B-roll, and liberal use of close-ups without establishing shots didn’t help the viewing experience. Special effects were done mostly with Karo syrup and food coloring, plus some green screen. The less said about the acting, the better.

There were some high points: the plot was moved forward by faux news reports, which were intermittently funny. The scene near the end of the movie with the posse looking for Bigfoot had a laugh-out-loud moment. Rance, the barista (baristo?) at the coffee shop says of Bigfoot, “Boobth. He’th afraid of boobth.” (I’m not sure that lisped line was meant to be as funny as I found it.)

Because it’s become a thing now, I am duty-bound to inform the reader that some of the actresses expose their bosoms during the film.

The movie’s epilogue explains a few plot points, so you won’t want to miss that. That is, if you made it through the movie’s first 37 minutes. I did, and may God have mercy on the tattered remains of my soul.

 

3 Responses to REVIEW: Gimme Head: The Tale of the Cuyahoga Valley Bigfoot

  • Thanks for a very thorough and sometimes compelling review. I’m not one of those film school guys with all the skills and equipment, and certainly not someone with a budget. At my age, perhaps I shouldn’t even try; but reviews like this can only make me want to work harder. And the review is not altogether dismal. I particularly like the comment: “…efforts were made to infuse genuine humor, social commentary, and titillation into the script. Does that excuse the end result? No, but writer/director Logan Fry tried. And even succeeded here and there.”

    Filmmaking can be a lonely and daunting process. I know so many who wait until their efforts might be perceived as near perfect, and therefore never commence at all. My primary goal is to tell a good story, and let the filmmaking skills develop as I go. And while Dave certainly called out the film technique, he didn’t altogether say the story was lacking. At worst, he says: “The story … centers around some grad students sitting in a coffee shop, watching a news report about Bigfoot stomping around the local woods. For reasons not made entirely clear, they decide to seek out this creature themselves…” What? Someone needs to explain the reason young people are curious? I may be old (probably twice Dave’s age), but I’d be out there, too. No explanation needed.

    Spelling and grammar note. In Ohio, where I’m from, and elsewhere in the USA, it’s is “barista.” The top definition in The Urban Dictionary for “baristo” is: “The word “baristo” is sometimes used as a male version of barista. However, that’s a case of hypercorrection. The word “barista” is gender-neutral.” Wiktionary tells us “baristo” comes: “[f]rom barista (“espresso-server”), the -a having been misinterpreted as the Italian feminine singular ending -a, and then substituted with the masculine singular ending -o to specify a masculine, rather than feminine, agent noun.” Even my spell-checker tries to turn “baristo” into “barista.”

    I’m not saying that this particular hypercorrection represents the entire tone of the review. I personally like the review for reasons expressed earlier.

    Finally, Rance clearly said “Boobs”! And what, my dear friends, is the matter with boobs? “Blood, Boobs and Beast” — Triple-B — is a horror staple; “Free the Boobs” has a strong advocates here in the USA (look it up); and my male actor, Michael S, pulls up his shirt to reveal his boobs as well… Like the word “Barista,” this is gender-neutral film at worst and, at best, a film that actually tries to elevate its female actors. They are central to the story.

    Logan Fry
    Writer, Producer and Director

    • Thanks for the interesting review. I appreciate your opinion. I especially appreciate being mentioned in the review!

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